Smuggling, Part 3 of ?

Here's a tip I ripped from a nerdy magician's online forum. And trust me, I risked my computer being dorked or voodoo death skulled whilst stealing this tip. You're welcome.
The premise:
To smuggle booze onto a oversized, overpriced boat full of booze.
Theory:
"I just have these cheetos, granola bars, and this pristine, unopened 6-pack of propel for kicking hangovers from the drinks I'll buy aboard. That's all. Move alone."
Reality: There's booze in them there propel bottles. Sucka.
So these mini-merlins said if you dip the cap end of an unopened bottle into boiling water, you can gently twist the top off, pulling with it the ring-seal intact. Then do with the liquid as you will, and screw the cap/ring back on, and you have the illusion that the bottle is and has been sealed.

Sounded like a solid theory. So I tested it. And I think it will work.

I purchased a ringed 6 pack of propels and kept all bottles in the rings to add to their virginity look.

Step 1:
Twist the cap to release the in-the-cap seal, being careful not twist the cap too far and break off its lower ring. You'll hear and feel an initial breaking of the internal seal.

Step 2:
With the cap twisted as far as it will go without having to jump over the bottle's ridge that breaks the ring off, flip the bottle upside down and dump out the propel, until the bottle is empty.
Note: Step 2 is somewhat optional. I thought step 2 may be necessary because its way easier to heat up the lid/ring without any liquid in the bottle. And you need to perform step 3 with a loose cap for the boiling water to take full effect in and around the ring/cap, and you don't want propel coming out all over the place. I didn't perform this smuggle technique without doing step 2. Omit step 2 at your own risk.

Step 3: Microwave a cup of water until vigorously boiling. Remove boiling water with hot-pad and flip bottle upside down and soak in water. I held the cap/ring/lid in the boiling water for a good minute to make sure it was plenty soft.

Step 4: As soon as you have soaked the lid for long enough, remove, and gently continue to twist cap off, using the end of a bottle opener or knife to pry up, and twist the ring along with the cap, as to remove both pieces together, in-tact.
You may have to practice on a few bottles. This is the hardest step.

Step 5: Fill bottle with a clear booze. Preferably vodka, so you can give it to me.

Step 6: Throw the intact cap/ring assembly into a newly boiled cup of water and let sit for a good minute.

Step 7: Carefully screw cap/ring back on, being sure not to break the ring from the cap. If you didn't break the ring off at all, congratulations. Its as good as drunk.
If you did break the ring some, no big worry, proceed to step 8.

Step 8: If you have broken the ring off, you may want to invest in a good plastic glue. Not the walgreens bond glue, instead I chose an instant glue used in radio-controlled aircraft assembly. You can find these products at your local hobby store. These high quality super glues bond in less than a minute and are nearly as strong as the plastic itself. *caution* It also glues your fingers to other things very well...including other fingers.
Simply run a bead of a good plastic glue at the union of the ring and cap and press the ring up snug against the cap and hold for a minute.(This is done with the cap/ring twisted back on) Wipe off any access/signs of being glued.

Even if you get the cap/ring back on, without any breakage of the ring, you may want to throw a small bead of plastic adhesive under the cap/ring area to temporarily bond the cap to the bottle to throw an illusion of a "pop" or "cracked virgin plastic seal" sound, should they give it a quick hand-tightness check.

I also ran the same steps on a basic water bottle with the same great results.


I scrubbed the Internet for cruise ship forums, where obviously, this topic was very common.

The overall consensus is, and which I totally agree with, the cruise lines strongly advertise that they will not let you board if you are caught smuggling booze. It is in their financial interest to do this.
However, there have been no cases, of all the discussions I've read in which this rule was actually enforced to that extreme. Not to say they couldn't, but they will admit, there is more money to made off of you whilst you enjoy their alcohol and gamble and buy stupid shit while you are on board than your initial ticket cost.

It looks like, worst case scenario, you have your booze taken, and you have to buy theirs.

Here's my preliminary plan of attack-
In my checked luggage: Smuggled 6-pack of propel tall-boys, using the booze technique outlined above.
One loose liter bottled water, boozified.
One large bottle of shampoo, boozified (still on the fence with this one...thinking of gluing on my own foil-seal using industrial strength plastic bond glue, using a foil seal from another of propel's bottles, the one with the twist/sport top.
and finally, One real bottle of cheap vodka, as to say "I was vaguely familiar with your alcohol policy, and took a chance with this bottle. You took it from me (which according to many cruiseship forums, doesn't happen that often, even with this obvious smuggle technique) and now I have to buy your booze."
Except I have way more booze in here, smuggled, and I will throw up somewhere that I'm not supposed to.

There you have it.

Ho, Ho, Ho From Maker's Mark

Okay, being a Markers Mark ambassador just keeps getting more awesome. They recently sent me a certificate package, notifying me that my personal barrel had been created. They even included about two dozen ambassador business cards, with my name on it. Pimp.

Then about 10 days ago, I got another gem. An entire gift wrapping package, including Makers Mark wrapping paper, Makers Mark ribbon and Makers Mark "to-from" cards. Take a look:






So from Me and Maker's Mark, have a very merry Christmas.

Perfect Sandwich seeking mate full of barley...

Today, beer fans, I created for the first time (at least in my kitchen) a sandwich that brought a tear to my eye and a food boner to my bathing suit area. Before I unveil it's loveliness, I beseech you B&B readers to match this carnivorous snack with a suitable beer. I present to you the Sneaky Pete:

On two slices of potato bread (which unbeknownst to this author beforehand is 99% fat free), dress the left slice with your favorite mayonaisse and the right slice with a nice spicy brown mustard (I like French's).
On the mustard slice, cover with hard salami (Target's Archer Farms brand makes a nice salami, but you can also get resourceful and use the stuff you'll get in your stocking on the 25th.)
On top of the mayo slice, make an obnoxious pile of thinly sliced roast beef. Thin is key here, fellas. It makes you more manly to stack more slices.
On top of the salami, apply a blanket of sharp cheddar. Any sharp cheddar will suffice and most pre-sliced packages are thick enough to provide a suitable cheese kick through the meat hug.
On top of the roast beef, apply two slices from a medium tomato. Give a good salting to the slices, you'll thank me.
Carefully place the two piles of awesomeness together and get ready. Accompany with a handful of the world's finest snack pickles, Gedney's Mini-Munchers.

I made this sandwich at lunch today and literally was impelled to masturbate immediately afterwards. I paired the sandwich with a bottle of Boulevard Pale Ale. It tasted great when poured into a pint glass because it was my last bottle of beer and it was at lunch. Don't tell my boss.

Now here's your homework, beerniks: Based on the aforementioned ingredients, what is the best beer for The Sneaky Pete?

Thanksgiving Beers: A Holiday Companion

I was thinking the other day about what makes a good Thanksgiving beer. It has to be something that tastes delicious at 10 AM or 7PM, with pumpkin pie or mashed potatoes. It obviously cannot be too filling, and probably more obviously needs to be sympathetic to your stomach during awkward conversations with aunts or Detroit Lions games. With that in mind, here are my beer recommendations along with some tips for a wonderful Thanksgiving:

1. Newcastle Brown Ale-This is the ultimate beer for Thanksgiving in my opinion. It tastes great in the morning, looks respectable enough that no one questions why you brought 18 of 'em and won't share, and isn't conducive to the kind of binge drinking that could cause you to pass out before the 4PM feast. My tip: have some red wine with dinner, and then crack one open to have with pie.


2. Sam Adams Winter Lager-I saw it in stores this week finally and I can't wait to put one to my lips. The master of the seasonal beers score another "A" with this one. A perfect way to wind down the festivities by the fire. My tip: get in that recliner, put on It's A Wonderful Life, and nurse it until your asleep. You've earned it.

3. Busch Heavy (Camo cans)-If your families' Thanksgivings are really just about getting hammered, this is the only way to play. No one, and I mean no one, should have light beer on Thanksgivng. Indulge yourself and head for the mountains. Is this beer white trash? Is it ironic? Is it good? Yes, No, No. It is definitely white trash, people in skinny jeans won't touch it, and it's not good, it's fucking awesome. My tip: go pheasant hunting, then grab a 12er of Camo Cans from the Speedee Mart in North Bend, NE and head back to civilization in time to clean your kill and get some football bets in before turkey time.

4. George Killians' Irish Red-If you want a crisp beer that makes it appear like you've splurged for the Holiday but really you found on sale for $4.99 a sixer at Meyer's Liquor, this is your baby. Is it good? I honestly don't remember. I believe that Coors makes it, and that is kind of awesome. My tip: bring a sixer and pawn it off as a faux act of generosity to that uncle you hate.


5. Pilsner Urquell-Celebrate your families' European roots (or not) with a beer that tastes like it is straight out of the river Danube. Ignore the atrocities of American imperialism and brutality with a taste of the old country. Bohemians of the world can unite around one fact: this beer sucks. This green-bottled, bitter bastard will be the only thing on the table less palatable than that cranberry jello shit my grandma makes. My tip: See numbers 1-4, and watch The Peanuts Thanksgiving special sometime this week. Sure it's not as good as The Great Pumpkin or the Christmas one, but it still fucking rules. Also, the only good thing that Jim Davis, creator of Garfield, has ever done is The Garfield Thanksgiving, so relive some childhood and catch that one, too.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

Anheuser-Busch shareholders bless InBev deal

By Matt Andrejczak, MarketWatch

Nov 12, 2008

SAN FRANCISCO (MarketWatch) -- Anheuser-Busch Cos. said Wednesday a majority of its shareholders voted to approve its proposed combination with rival beer giant InBev NV.

When the deal closes, Anheuser-Busch shareholders will get $70 in cash for each share of Anheuser-Busch stock they own.

The deal, which creates the world's largest beer company, is valued at $52 billion. The new company will be called Anheuser-Busch InBev.

A closing date has not been set, but the companies expect the merger to be done before the end of the year. InBev shareholders had approved the merger on Sept. 29

St. Louis-based Anheuser-Busch (BUD) and Belgian-based InBev together operate 300 brands, including Anheuser's Budweiser and Bud Light and InBev's Stella Artois and Beck's.

The board at Anheuser-Busch resisted initial advances from InBev before agreeing to a sweetened buyout offer in July. The deal upset people in St. Louis, where Anheuser-Busch is one of the region's key employers, taxpayers and charitable givers.

"Under the merger, the new company will expand Budweiser into new markets around the world, fulfilling the global ambitions my family has long dreamed about for this great American brand," Anheuser-Busch President and Chief Executive August A. Busch IV said in a statement. He will be a director at the combined company.

For the first time in their 17 year history

New Belgium has new tap handles. I know, its breaking news you'll only hear at B&B, and it impacts your life more than you know.
Gone are the traditional wood handles. Enter, recycled bike rim modern sons'-a-bitches. Just don't get ripped and fall on them.

Battle of Fort Collins: New Belgium vs Odell

I'm about to go to the fridge and when I get there I'll have a decision to make: 90 Shilling or Cutthroat Porter. I can't wait, because either way I win. I'll get to enjoy a fine brew from my newest "brew-crush"--Odell Brewing Company of Fort Collins Colorado. I just can't seem to find a beer from this establishment that doesn't make me smile, both inside and out. Perhaps I'm late to a bandwagon, but I think Odell is becoming my favorite Fort Collins brewer. Sorry New Belgium, I've always been a fan, but right now Odell is (in my opinion) just offering better beer.

Notes:
Odell--

• The Good: Levity, Cutthroat, 90 Shilling, 5 Barrel Pale Ale
• Decent: Easy Street Wheat
• The Bad: Haven't tried them all; but haven't met one I didn't like
  
• Would Like To Try: IPA
• Never been to the brewery

New Belgium--

• The Good: Blue Paddle; Mothership Whit
• Decent:1554
• Losing My Interest: Fat Tire; Sunshine Wheat
  
• The Bad:Trippel
• WTF?: Springboard
  
• Would Like to Try: Mighty Arrow;
  
• Clearly your Green Efforts; Environmental Stewardship; and Corporate Philosophy are not to be competed with

Thoughts?

Silliness.

I don't know where these guys are from or what they're saying, but I do know they have way too much free time.

With that said, if you have a more interesting way to open a beer, send it to thecaptain@brewsnbooze.com, and we'll post it to the site.

2 Things

1. I just bought a 6 pack of Levity from Joe's Bottle Shop and paid 9.78. I guess it costs a bunch to put it on a truck and ship it from the other world that is Fort Collins.

2. Jay McEntee sold it to me.

See ya Zima. Pussy.

The malternative drink that propelled countless pre-teens into a life of luxurious alcoholism will be produced no more.

Pour one out in the comments.

And please, fly your vaginas at half mast.

Whats behind that micro-goodness?

Wall Steet Journal says, New Belgium ranks among the top small businesses on earth. Thats how. Congrats bikey beer folks.
Its probably no coincidence.

Google: Friend of the B&B Blog . . . ?

Google introduces "Google Goggles"

Hey friends. It turns out that now you can set your Gmail account to challenge you with a Math question when you try to send an email during hours preset by you. Thanks Google. Because I'm always getting wasted and starting 'e-fights.' I cannot tell you how many times I've woken up after a wild night of recliner beers wondering if I "really did hit send" and checking my inbox and realizing "OMG I totally did."

So now I can set my account to make me answer a Math question before it sends. A fucking Math question!? You don't think I can do Math drunk? I excel at Drunk Math like Nathan Nowak excels at Drunk Driving!! How about making me do something really tough like operating heavy machinery or convincing my wife to have sexual relations with me? Because if I had to do that shit, I'd never send off those crisis-causing belligerant emails that Google is supposed to save me from now.

So in Summary, I say thanks but no thanks to your little 'google goggles' (thanks Sarah Palin-at least you're good for one liners). Instead of keeping me from sending 'drunk-mails', here's some shit I'd rather have you Drunk-protect me against:

-Being way to involved in awkward party conversations
-downloading music that I'll never listen to
-Having one more because there's something really good on Friday Night TV
-?

What else?

Ooopa-fucking-pa!

Contrary to chatter at exit177.com, Octoberfest SF was full of incredibly good looking people.
I've said this before, if you're a single young buck (that mate with doe) and you like to party, there are plenty of fish in the Bay. There is of course an obvious answer for that, of which you can find strolling around the downtown Crate & Barrel on a Sunday. With scarves on.
No but Octoberfest by the Bay pairs two great things: a loud, boisterous, drunken oompa pa band that plays Journey and the rest of the kids' favorites with panoramic views of a few national monuments and a rock, and a beer specifically made for festivals.
What a great idea. True banquet beer.

It was a huge crowd that blew through piles of kegs, but they contained only one beer, Spaten.
Apparently its a Munich staple and has been for like 500 years. You should read about it.
And it has a shovel for a logo that speaks not only to the quantity you'll have but also the fate of the end of your day should you abuse Spaten.

It was a dark bodied something or other. From the label I believe its an Urmarzen. And a damn good Urmarzen at that, if I've never had one.
After 3 liters, and of course they're sold in liters, it really didn't throw me to the ground as I predicted, and Luke Caudillo.
But it was enough for me to slip into an accidental conversation with a toothless security guard regarding whether or not the drunk dude that dove into the Bay would be arrested or not.
Let Spaten be the judge in that case. Track it down, its apparently on this whirl-wind national Octoberfest tour, so its pretty busy.












See, hot chicks.

Its GABF week bitches!

Is anyone in the midwest going?? I mean sheesh. I'll say this, and its a one time offer, if you go, live-blog it, and generate a 3 page report on your favorites, you can miss my wedding. For free!
But if you don't have your tickets yet, you'll be scraping them off craigslist at discount prices I bet.
According to their website, they're podcasting, web-streaming, blogging, everything but projecting the event onto the side of a russian sub.
Should be exciting.
Check that, its the funnest time you can have in 4 hours. Ever.
See you there! (via the internet).

Another Beer Fest to check out

www.tellurideblues.com

- also look at the numerous posts made today

Beer Quiz - highlights from the Beer magazines quiz

HERE ARE THE ANSWERS TO THESE QUESTIONS THAT WERE POSTED EARLIER THIS WEEK.

Beer enthusiast is known as a:
A) tegestologist
B) brewotophist
C) cerevisaphile
D) wortologist
Answer is C - google it.

From which century can be found the earliest evidence of beer?
A) 4,000 B.C.
B) 9,000 BC
C) 500 A.D.
D) 10,000 BC
Answer is A - evidence from a stamp seal from tepe gawra

Bunging means what to a beer?
A) how it gets its bubbles
B) how it is fermented
C) how it is casked
D) how to determine if it is skunked
Answer is a -

Oktoberfest was originally a...
A) brewers' party
B) celebration of the end of the summer
C)celebration of the nectar of the gods
D) a wedding party
Answer is D - prince ludwig of bavaria married princess theresa in 1810, the celebration lasted 16 days and was so much fun that they decided to celebrate it every year since.

What country consumes the most beer per capita
A) united states
B) Czech republic
C) russia
D) ireland
Answer is B-czech 167 liter per capita, US 85

What is it called when you do not finish a beer.
A) to wound a beer
B) to sammet a beer
C) to mormon a beer
D) to mourn a beer
Answer is B

Beer of the Season

Brown Ale - as the season changes and the leaves began to change and the temperature begins to drop, it is time for seasonal change in beer as well. This recommendation is not from own thoughts, but from the thoughts of Beer the magazine (www.thebeermag.com). The brown ale will make a great addition to a fall night BBQ or while feasting on venison (meat of any animal killed by hunting).

Best Brown Ale choices?

Sarah Palin Drinking Game

For tomorrow's debate, here's the game:

Rule #1: Every time Palin says something convoluted, non-sensical, or links together words that don't even make a real sentence; drink.

Rule #2: Every time you feel awkward and uncomfortable for Palin; drink.

Well. . . those are all the rules. Hope you don't have to work Friday, cause you're gonna be w a s t e d!

Well Said.

Some pregame research for a new tiki bar I'm attacking tonight.
Here's one of their drink descriptions. Nails.

The Undertow
If you can drown in a teaspoon of water, imagine what a ten-ounce combination of rum and juice can do.

ELECTRO FIZZ

This quick post is for a drink that I wish to create. One of Laura's 3rd year Audiology classes is called "Electro Physiology" and she and her classmates all refer to it as 'Electro Phys.' I think it sounds like a rather exciting and event inspiring drink.

If you've got concoctive aspirations for what it could be, let me know. If it's good enough perhaps we'll whip some up at FFF6. I was thinking something along the lines of a kamikaze mixed w/ a champagne cocktail, but don't let that limit your creativity. Also, please include a description of why you chose the ingredients included.

Cheers Y'all!

Summer Hangover

Now that the first 2 weeks are in the books for the greatest sport on earth I can break myself free from researching/nervous twitching. I'd like to thank Coors Light, and its subsidiaries, for its consistent support. (As much as I keep trying to believe it is the cat's shit, those wide-opening cans really don't do anything.) To get back to posting about beers that are too hard to find, and no one would buy anyway, I'd like to share a great dialogue between the creative minds at New Belgium.
Apparently they are releasing a new ale accidentally flavored with espresso.
Coffee beers are the worst. First, no other beverage category has been successful at capitalizing on the second most traded commodity in the world. Coke Blak? 2 weeks. Jamocha shakes from Arby's? Well, bad example.
Second, as a biased non coffee guy, isn't coffee more of a necessity than good flavor? Do people actually like the taste of coffee? It really makes people's faces and urine smell.
That said, there is some good insight into how a great company thinks about things.
If I were surrounded by beer all day at work, I would be more productive too.

Some have wondered where the name, and more prominently, the label image came from. Well, here’s the story of Giddy Up. It started as a naming brainstorm. It ended with a personality. And a really big…

From: Greg Owsley
Subject: Re: Espresso Ale naming help
Sent: Tuesday, April 08, 2008 7:58 AM
1st off, I’m friggin thrilled with the new beer. All the blah blah in the world can’t replace imaginatively delicious liquid like this.

I was thinking about naming the new beer, which in fine Bouckaert fashion, defies style. So at our creative meeting yesterday, when I informed them that the new beer has considerable caffeine, I was reminded of the name of the espresso company I dreamed up but never opened, Giddy Up.

Initial reactions? Other ideas? Label art?

From: Bryan Simpson
I’ll spin on some naming and I’ll revisit my aesthetic position on putting the image of a glass of beer on a bottle of beer – me not like this.

I do like “Giddy up” tho. Fun to say and gets at pick-me-up/stimulant while beer is self-evident.

From: Melyssa Glassman
I like Giddy Up, too. While the coffee/espresso references immediately take me to a darker brew, it’s the obvious place to be. So, here are some name ideas that work towards the actual red color within a coffee sort of way:

Red Roast
Red Alert
Belgian Blend
Rooster
Red Rooster

I like the Rooster idea because they wake you up, they’re red, it’s a fun image and fun to say. It could be Red Rooster, The Rooster, Rooster Ale…etc.

From: Greg Owsley
So, I was liking Red Rooster Ale. But, sigh, a quick google revealed 3 (!) RR ales already in business.
Giddy Up is it? Imagery?
What about a red rooster?

From: Bryan Simpson
What about a red rooster? Riding a horse.

From: Jodi Taylor
I don’t know if you’re kidding but I like it. Anne did a good job painting Arrow the dog.

From: Bryan Simpson
Kinda kidding but I like the surreal element. I’m cc-ing the others just to see if there’s traction.

From: Greg Owsley
Rooster on horse. I like it. For me, It conjures up my favorite form of surrealism, those absurd postcards of the west – jackalope, fur-bearing trout…

From: Jodi Taylor
I pictured just that – the stiff profile view of the rooster on the horse in a Colorado pastoral setting, brownish for fall. I’ll photoshop an image together.

From: Bryan Simpson
We’ve got a spokes model! Started as a gag but a rooster riding a horse definitely makes you stop and ponder… wtf? I gotta know what this tastes like!

* * *
So there you have it. The not so impressive, but fun while it lasted, email exchange that gave life to the label and a darn good cock-a-doodle brew.

Fall Seasonal Season!

The equinox is rapidly desending upon us and with the joys of turning leaves and crisp autumn weather we have a new batch of seasonals to sample. So, try something off the beaten path and let us know about that rare oktoberfest or rare fall seasonal that you had to break up that otherwise endless stream of millercoorsbudmolsonstella you had while watching football on Saturday and Sunday. The Sam Adams* Oktoberfest (click here for beeradvocate reviews) comes to mind as a go to seasonal from last year.

*Sam Adams should be commended for their bailout of small brewers without long term hops contracts with growers. In a market that saw the price of this dire ingredient shoot from $3-5/lb to $15-20/lb many small batch brewers who purchase supplies while they go were sure to go under. Sam held a lottery of all interested brewers (hop sharing program results) to buy so many lbs of it's stockpile of hops at cost (roughly $5/lb). Their quote from the article "hey, we were the little guy too once" says it all to me. Cheers to Sam Adams.

Boozer of the Week.

This guy:

Man jailed after sending Iowa hostages for beer
via Chicago Tribune

Offended

OK, I realize that as a non-contributing contributor, I probably don't have a whole lot of room to bitch about things that are or are not on this site.

That said, it is downright offensive that the ultimate in college drinking is not listed in the poll. The beer that fueled many of the Man In Black's stories to unsuspecting freshmen girls ("I'm actually half Jewish," "I was a husky model for JC Penny when I was 5," "I promise I'll call you," etc.), fountain runs, naked pull-ups at the front doors of sororities, et. al.

This beer, my friends, is the beer of champions. The beer that did not need to be called by name. No, all that needed to be said and done for it to be understood what a young, aspiring academic needed to drink that Tuesday night was to hand the person making the beer run $12, and simply ask for "30 'Stones."

The beer: Keystone Light.

I'm saddened by its exclusion.

Poor College Kid Beer

Uh...Natural Light

Micro'd: Gordon Biersch Brewery

(Note: This is part one of a yet to be determined number of installations titled "Micro'd" in which I go to a microbrewery and drink every different beer I can before being: a. thrown out b. divorced c. a new father. Who am I kidding? I really just had a few beers before going out to eat with my parents. My life is not exactly ripe with adventure at this point. It is worth noting that all beers were sampled in pints, and not those pussy beer flight things that they enjoy on the coasts where binge drinking is done mostly in closed quarters.)

Gordon Biersch brewery is a chain of breweries that is headquartered inexplicably in Chattanooga, TN despite not having a restaurant in the state of Tennessee. They have locations all over the place, though, like San Fran, Colorado, and the one I frequented in the heart of the Power and Light District in downtown KCMO, (a truly pretentious, over the top, enjoyable in quarterly doses venue) where I sat on a Friday night and drank by myself for an hour or two. They offer a really decent, somewhat expensive lineup of apps and entrees that are allegedly made from scratch and the food looked good for standard upscale brewery-type fare (think Upstream or Lazlo's-ish).

The beer report:

Marzen: Their most popular beer and the first one I tried. It was Newcastle-y in color and sweet like that beer as well. A potentially great beer after a round of golf or other non-threatening situations, I felt like this is what they recommend to people who only drink Bud Light or are on a diet. No hops to be seen. The Jonas Brothers of beers really. I don't know what that means.

Czech Lager: Now we're on the trolley! A pilsner that was truly spicy. It had some kick and some gusto. Pizazz! Shazam! Wheee! No seriously, this one was really good.

Hefeweisen: Full disclosure time: I wouldn't describe myself as a big wheat beer fan and this one also fell flat for me. Something about the combination of fruit in beer and the loaf-of-bread-in-a-glass factor got me here. If a company could make a wheat beer that didn't require fruit and didn't make me feel like Prince Fielder after two glasses, I could potentially be in.

Golden Export: Their Budweiser, and the last one I had. This is really what they recommend to people that only like light beers. I thought it kind of had a paint thinner aftertaste. Not good times. If you go to microbreweries seeking beers like this, see also: Coors Original anywhere west of Exit 305 (Alda) in Nebraska.

They also had a seasonal bock I regretfully wasn't able to try, in retrospect this should have replaced the Hefeweisen for me. Out of the four beers I had, big raising of the glass to the Czech and (less so, but still) the Marzen. Bad times to the Hefeweisen and Golden Export.

Modern Drunkard Convention - Denver, CO

I won't be able to go to this, but if you're in the Denver area and don't go....consider this your slap to the face.

Drunkard National Convention
August 29-31
Denver, CO

Brew of the Month - August

Zima, the beer "Malternative." Because people are too big of vaginas to post stuff to this blog.

Get it together.

By the way, apparently Zima has "gone citrus." I guess they've always been for Fruits, now they're just not hiding it anymore. You can say Zima is "out of the closet."

When will the Belgians stop?

Leave it up to those damn Belgians to come up with a "scratch and strip" beer bottle. That's right, you scratch the swimsuit off the lady to reveal the belgian goodies. If such a thing exists.

And leave it up the the British to be too proper to sell it.

UK bans Rubbel Sexy Lager

Beer Nostalgia Reigns

With the success of Grain Belt and Pabst, is Schlitz the next beer to come back on a large scale?

Probably.

(Oh, and thanks to Jimstock and The Baldridge people for all of the delicious seasoning, and check exit177 or HeavySoul for the running diary of my North Platte class reunion trip/Fort Cody visit sometime tonight. Great times.)

Grain Belt Premium is TOO good.

After years and years of drinking beer, I've become accustomed to having a little bite at the end of every drink. Then I tried Grain Belt Premium.

Here's what happened, initially it tasted very good, nice and malty. Then I waited for the everyday beer kick at the end.

I'm still waiting.

That's the story behind Grain Belt Premium. There is no freakin' bite. And I'm not sure I like it. It's like Pavlov's dog, I've been classically conditioned to believe that every beer has an ending flavor that either tickles your balls, or bites them. I'm so used to the bite of beer, that I don't know if I can let Grain Belt Premium into my beer-drinking life.

Grain Belt Premium is like the perfect set of boobies that everyone thinks are fake...but actually, they're real.

After the approximately 2 billion beers that I've already drank in my lifetime, it's taking me a little while to grasp this whole "biteless" beer. But I'll get there.

I guess I agree...

It happened.

The great American Institution that is Anheuser Busch, is now owned by Belgians. Just this morning, InBev purchased the American beer juggernaut for a cool $52 Billion dollars.

Here's the story from CNN.

Many people think this is a horrible thing, the end to one of the great American companies. But others (i.e. stockholders) think this is a good move.

So what's your take?

Key West Sunset Ale - Everything Key West isn't

Whoever named this beer either a.) has never been to key west, or b.) is 15. For a beer named Key West Sunset Ale, this beer is everything I imagine Key West NOT to be.

Unfortunately, the only frame of reference I have of Key West is from MTV's The Real World. Hence, I can only imagine what KW is like. I imagine barely dressed women getting so wasted they pass out along the beach. I imagine heat, lots of it. So hot it makes me sweat out of my eyeballs. I imagine an island full of Carribbeans who feel somewhat like Americans, but when we go there, they get us drunk and make fun of us. Which is fine because we're too drunk to care. I imagine palm trees, hurricanes, steel drums, and more drunk college students all singing Jimmy Buffet. I image flip-flops, sand, and erections. And if I had to imagine a sunset, it would be perfect. A bright orange sun that dips below the crystal clear water, creating an absolute heaven.

With that, this beer is almost illegally disappointing. If I had to liken it to anything, it'd be Fat Tire, which is the furthest from key west you can get. Hippy chicks, not naked ones. Cool Fort Collins air where they don't even have air conditioners, not sweltering heat with AC in every 5-star resort. Fat Tire is eco-friendly, which is the opposite of drunk tourists scattering their beer bottles and salt shakers all over the beachfront.

Fat Tire stands for something. Key West Sunset Ale stands for something too...shit.

The taste is malty with a hint of crappy citrus flavor. It actually tastes like whatever citrus they put in it was grown in Colorado. Sure, it's a smooth beer with a decent malty flavor. But you don't prance around like some flaming ballerina and call yourself Ray Lewis.

Horrible metaphors aside, Key West Sunset Ale is a horrible metaphor for Key West, but a great metaphor for anus.

Hangovers: The After-Party Grab Bag of Booze

One of the best things, in fact it may be the only good thing about having people at your house besides not driving, is all the leftover booze that people place in your fridge.

The other night I had a meager 10 people over to mostly grill burgers, drink, and light M80s in my driveway to the dismay of my uptight suburban neighborhood. In the span of one rather low-key night, I collected the following:

A four pack of ginger beer for Moscow Mules

One Michelob Ultra bottle, which I am drinking right now

Three very chic Michelob cans, that are streamlined to suggest to coke-addled models, "Drink me and you can still see your clavicles in the mirror while you chop out the next one."

At least a dozen Coors Light cans

Four or five Coors Light bottles

A half empty bottle of Skyy

So I ask you, dear Brews and Booze readers, what is your best after-party haul?

I can't believe this almost happened.

Apparently, about two months ago, there was major speculation that Guinness was planning to close their original James Gate Brewery.

Brews & Booze apologizes for falling asleep on this one. How could we not have heard about this? Anyway, lucky for us (and all brew enthusiasts) the fine people at Guinness changed their mind.

Here's the entire story, from NYTIMES.com.

Redbridge - Smells like feed lot, tastes like small town prom night.

This is a pretty unique beer. Disguised as a small batch micro, Anheuser-Busch just made a beer that has given 3.2 million yankees hope. 3.2 million men and women can now temporarily remove the pain of foreclosure. They can numb their domestic disputes without fear of violent illness. And best of all, its smooth as hell and will stand up to reasonably sloppy marathons.

Long and short, its made with sorghum, and does not contain wheat or barley,which apparently makes 3.2 million people, suffering from Celiac Disease, super bitchy and not fun to be around. This according to Anheuser. And I always trust health reportings from the people who mess us up.
It really does smell sorghumy and a bit like that shit that sticks to the inside of a lawnmowery smell. But it finishes hoppy and almost creamy.


Verdict: Glad I picked it up. Its worth the experience. I saw this at GABF 2006, however, and I've always said this, if you locate your beer in the center of the GABF, you better have stickers or some other gimmick, because no one will remember what it tasted like.

July 4th Beer - the obvious choice

One of the Founding Fathers of our great country, Sam Adams was integral in the Boston Tea Party and other events. But it's funny, he's now associated with great beer, eventhough he ran his family's brewery into the ground.

Cheers, Sam Adams. Cheers, America.

Have a safe 4th of July everyone.

July Beer of the Month

Dear Brews and Booze drinkers-

My official July brew/booze of the month nomination is sour beers. Actually, no one in particular, just that oft misunderstood, bizarre, and tangy category of beers perfected by the Belgiums (is it Belgese or even Belginians, which ever it is, I bet their women are hot). As a placeholder for this beer, my prediction for the new 'it' beer type for the masses, was crafted in Nebraska's favorite rival city, Boulder, by Avery Brewing Co. *Note* as you can tell by the 'craftiness' of their website, their beers are usually a disappointment)
I asked a specialty beer shop worker in San Francisco for a 'sour beer', and this is what I was dealt. Avery Fifteen Anniversary Ale.

The label describes the ingredients as follows: mission figs, hibiscus flowers, and white pepper. Having tried a total of none of those things, I can tell you, I still have no idea what this beer tastes like. Plus, it was 8 dollars. So all in all, this is the most unhelpful, non productive beer suggestion ever. But it was sour on the tail. And that, my boozers, is what I'm after.

Further research tells me it gets this sourness from the yeast strain 'brettanomyces' which is generally a deal-killer for beers and wines, except for the Belginians, who use this strain to draw out the tart in their beers' fruit notes.
There are others methods of making beer sour (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brettanomyces). I like those better.

What turned me on the sour beers? My love for vinegar, an accidental buy of a tub of 'cry-baby' chewing gum in the early 90's, and New Belgium's La Folie. If you find yourself in their Fort Collins tasting room, ask for a bottle of this. You will hit someone, it tastes so good.

And I paired it with the new season of the Real World. The Real World was over-cooked, tough, and certainly dry. Sarah sucks at journalism.

Nominated by JimStock.

Booze of the Month

Well, for July we received two nominations for Brew of the Month. However, one of the nominations was liquor. Which is perfect, because now I don't have to pick a winner, because this nomination won BOOZE of the Month:

White Grape Smirnoff, nominated by Jen:


A sweet drink without being "Jolly Rancher". You'll want to drink it on the rocks. Chasers are a thing of the past. It's that good.

I could have opted for a professional image of the bottle but felt the counter view was easier to relate to.

There you have it. Thanks, Jen.

MillerCoors Light - Two Companies, One Cup

For what its worth, Miller and Coors are now one damned entity. Creatively, the name of the company is Millercoors. Hours upon nerdy-marketing hours were spent brainstorming the name of this new company. So what are the implications of Miller and Coors colliding?
Uhh...2 Heineken's please!

Ah, the future is nice.

Brew of the Month Nominations due TOMORROW!!!

Three exclamation points means business...Brew of the month nominations are due tomorrow.

email them to brewofthemonth@brewsnbooze.com

Bud Buyout Heating Up

America is taking notice of the potential Anheuser-Busch buyout by InBev.

It was one of the top stories on FastCompany.com yesterday. Check it out.

Mighty Arrow: Another reason to go down on New Belgium?

Has anyone tried New Belgium's Mighty Arrow pale ale yet? I'd like a review if possible. I saw it during my one day visit to the Fort this year, and it was only available in these new "folly packs" (a brilliant new marketing ploy in which you must buy a 12 pack containing 3 each of 4 of New Belgium's beers in order to try their seasonal oddities). Apparently Mighty Arrow is a tribute to the owners' dog, which just passed away. There a plenty of reviews for it at the Beer Advocate, but I refuse to read words that won't end up making me laugh. If you are closer to the brewery than I, and I'm guessing you are, save our South American readers, pick up a folly pack today and post your drunk opinion.

Wild West Microbrew Fest: A Report

Random Thoughts from Year two of the Newest Cool Thing Added to Nebraskaland Days:

• They checked ID's but let my 6 month old son in.
• The Free Glass they gave me said "Beamish Genuine Irish Stout." That beer wasn't included in the tasting.
  
• Big Sky Brewing Company (Missoula, Montana) was highly represented. About half of the 20 or so beers there were from this Brewery. None of them were any good--perhaps you've tasted "Moose Drool"?
• JW Dundee's Honeybrown was one of the featured beers--seemed to be a big hit. Is this even a "microbrew"?
• My favorite was probably Sierra Nevada's Summer Ale. A nice Ale without too much "Summer" added. Breckenridge Brewery's "Summerbright" was not as good--bad aftertaste.
• Drank beer with the Assistant Superintendent and HS Principal. Wish I could remember all of the cliches and bad jokes.
• Zach Linstedt (sp?) and Shayna Dunn (sp?) were there.
  
• People were pissed that they didn't get full beers.
• Lifehouse plays tomorrow. Hope they play "Hanging By a Moment." I should bring a lighter.
  

Little known hangover cure made in Memphis...really just crushed aspirin.

A colleague of mine informed me today of a hangover remedy that is big in the south. No it isn't chicken and waffles, or illiteracy. BC Powder has been marketed for a 100 years as "the working man's friend", "freeing up your time spent dealing with headaches from the workplace, to spend time with your family."
Well, naturally drunks have gotten ahold of it, and use it to shake their julep benders.
Moderately entertaining website, considering A) its a pharmaceutical and B) 30% of their market can't read so they have to rely on graphics to convey their message.
I think they did a good job-If you are a southern dude; 1. rip the powder down your throat 2. continue breaking up Union railroad lines with that shovel, hangover-free of course.
If you are a southern belle; 1. in a powder room, drop powder into glass 2. mix in sexism, domestic fear 3. throw it down, now get out there and watch men vote!

I have a theory on how this stuff works: once the contents of the crushed medicated powder cover your tongue and start to dissolve your mouth, you forget about your hangover. Its no menudo, but I suppose it might just do the trick.

New Belgium makes good beer without giving mother nature a hangover.

A great post from GreenUpgrader.
Basically, it breaks down how The New Belgium Brewery is nearly 100% sustainable. A couple highlights:

-- They use 50% less water than the industry average
-- Energy efficient brewing process with equipment that uses 65% less energy
-- Their building is lit with solar tubes
-- Their building is built from reclaimed lumber and their furniture from reclaimed materials
-- They send their spent grain (used in the brewing process) to a local cattle farm for feed.
-- They are able to divert 98% of their waste from the landfill!

Check out even more at New Belgium's site.

Via Green Upgrader

Yep.

From The Onion = hilarious.


Study: Nearly 80 Percent Of Roommates Got So Drunk Last Night

Become a Maker's Mark Ambassador

Ladies and gentlemen, I'm proud to say that I'm now an official Maker's Mark Ambassador. I get my name on a barrel of Maker's, they're sending me a certificate, and I get all sorts of special offers. Pretty Rad. However, it's your responsibility as an ambassador to recruit more ambassadors.

So if you love Maker's Mark Bourbon, I encourage you to join the family.

Makers Mark website

Beer of the month nominations

You can now email your beer of the month nominations to:

brewofthemonth@brewsnbooze.com

On the 26th of every month, one of the regular bloggers will be selected to pick the best nomination. He/She will have to pick the winner by the 30th, for it to be posted on the 1st or 2nd.

So, nominations are now open for July, with the nominating period ending June 26th. Dig?

For any other inquiries, email thecaptain@brewsnbooze.com

That's right.

Leninade - A drink for the Masses!!!

I found this gem through Pete's link. When it asked "flavor?" I clicked "strange."

What a fantastic mixer for Russian Vodkas. In fact, apparently people call any mix with this stuff, a COMMIE KAZI.

F'n genius.

Here's it's Narration, from the site:

Leninade
12oz Bottle. Many people who once escaped from the Soviet Union, upon tasting Leninade, have overwhelmingly remarked that it is "BETTER THAN EXPECTED"; and those who prefer vodka in their potables have been known mix it with Leninade and ice to make a COMMIE KAZE. The Marx Brothers would be so proud. But even if you're a teetotaler you can get tired of Russky Chai and Drink As Lenin Drank!

Contains: Carbonated water Cane Sugar Citric Acid Gum Acacia Natural and Artificial flavors. Calories: 150

SODA GURU'S RATING: 5 Red Stars

...came the unforgettable October of 2002 when the flavours and colours of seven decades of Soviet History were condensed into a bottle for the first time. Thus presented itself the choice that needed to be made as to whether this bottle should be placed on display in a mausoleum or spread out for the masses to enjoy. Choice... what a concept; so a compromise was made: Only one flavour of Leninade but enough for everybody!!!

At your next Party, follow the Party Line by mixing Leninade with your favourite Soviet Vodka and make COMMIE KAZES for your comrades who will then name you a Hero Of Socialist Flavour!
__________________
BINGO. This is amazing.

Leninade via SodaKing

By Popular Demand

Although there doesn't appear to be a Kentucky Nip website, it is allegedly made by White Rock beverages, who make Sioux City Sasparilla, among others, and it is available from bluedogbeverages.com.

Also found this review from bevnet:

"Kentucky Nip is one of the smoothest, most easy sipping cherry flavored sodas that we have ever tasted here at The BevNET. Actually, it is much more than just a cherry flavored soda. Kentucky Nip has natural raspberry and mint flavors as well. This gives it an even more sophisticated taste. A highly recommended beverage."

June Beer of the Month = Summer Shandy

Looks like Leinenkugel pretty much wrote their own nomination on this one. But from personal experience, this beer is one of the finest citrus flavored beers I've ever tasted. First off, it's lemonade, not just lemon. So you get the sour of lemon, with the sweetness of aids.

Wait, that didn't come out right.

When it comes to beer, lemon is the best citrus. Orange can go to hell. And don't give me your "what about Blue Moon" b.s.. Orange and beer are a match made in anus (unless it's orange beers at a morning tailgate). And Lime is the first cousin of Lemon, so I won't bash it too much, in fear of some citrus mafia thugs throwing me in the Rio Grande with "cement shoes" or "zapatos cementos."

But back to Summer Shandy. What a fine summer drink. Normally, citrus-based drinks are very strong and bitter, with too high of a fruit to beer taste ratio. But not the Shandy. It starts smooth, with just a hint of lemon. But as you finish, the drink ends with a perfect summer taste of lemonade.

Personally, I took a first sip, sat for about two seconds, then thought to myself, "Whoa," then proceeded to pound about 7 back. You can't do that with many fruity beers, the fruit is just too sweet. But you can easily throw back 100 of these gems and not think twice.

There's probably a lot of funnier and more interesting things I could write about the perfect summer beer...but I'm at work...just wishing I was outside, at a lake, drinking some Lieiny Summer Shandies. But if anyone asks, this 1/2 hour was totally billable.

New recipie: Kahlua Strawberry Shots

So, I joined a BBQ team this year and while it has its own host of stories, one pertinent tidbit of information that I thought I should offer up that is mostly unrelated to BBQ is something new that I experienced in the way of artful intoxication. This really seemed to help the transition from eating and hanging out to a full on frenzy on the dance floor (read: it will get females dance floor tipsy in a hurry).

What you need:
-fresh strawberries, with stems and cores removed with a paring knife so as to create a hollow cup-like vessel
-vodka or grain alcohol
-kahlua or other coffee liquer
-whipped cream

1. Soak the prepared strawberries in the vodka or grain alcohol for an hour or two in the fridge to absorb some of the booze and to cool them off.

2. Pour the strawberry shot glasses full of Kahlua and top with whipped cream, preferrably the stuff in the can.

3. Eat the whole thing and enjoy.

Let me know what observations and comments you have on this, variations you come up with or have heard of, or even better, stories and pictures of the results of trying it on your own.

Cheers!

Major Brew Merger in the Works?

Stories from around the globe are telling of a potential merger between InBev and Anheuser-Busch. Who the hell is InBev you ask? Well, InBev is the Belgian brewer responsible for such beers as Stella Artois and Becks.

Read about it here, on MSNBC

Oh, and apparently it would be bad for Mexicans. That comes from the International Herald Tribune.

Hello, wheelhouse

Well if this isn't a story that is all-encompassing what this blog stands for, I don't know what is. I'm too excited to properly editorialize.

American Craft Beer Week May 12-18. Celebrate the History of Beer-making by drinking for 7 days, possibly losing job/friends

Here is a schedule of special 'toastings' next week with some key members of Sam Adams, across the country, and believe you me, these people would love to meet you. So get out there, get some face time, and lets convert them to Brews&Booze fans:

City	Date & Time	Restaurant	Brewer
New York	Monday, May 12, @ 6:30pm	Bloomingdale's	Jim Koch w/ Chef David Burke
San Francisco	Tuesday, May 13, @ 6:00pm	Monk's Kettle	Grant Wood
Boston	Tuesday, May 13, @ 7:00pm	Toro	Jim Koch
Chicago	Wednesday, May 14, @ 5:30pm	Harry Caray's	Bob Cannon
Los Angeles	Wednesday, May 14, @ 6:30pm	Daily Grill	Grant Wood
Denver	Thursday, May 15, @ 8:00pm	Rioja	Bob Cannon
Philadelphia	Thursday, May 15, @ 6:00pm	Monk's Belgian Cafe	Jim Koch
San Diego	Thursday, May 15, @ 6:00pm	Dussini Mediterranean Bistro	Grant Wood
Washington D.C.	Friday, May 16, @ 6:00pm	Mie N Yu	Jim Koch
Phoenix	Friday, May 16, @ 6:00pm	Rustler's Roost	Grant Wood

And if you don't live by one of these cities, well, maybe think about it.

Partially related; I attended an event last night that featured several local heavy hitters, Sierra Nevada, Pyramid, and Pacific Coast(whom does not distribute outside of a 50 mile radius, but still delicious). I worked the Pyramid 'special events' chick, so hopefully, look for their presence on this blog in the future. They will also come serve at an event we throw and talk beer talk. The only catch; it really needs to be in the Bay Area. Think about it.

I'd like to pimp Pyramid Brewery for this post.
Whether its a hot sunny day in your backyard or watching the Athletics at the Mac, Curveball Ale, is always the right pitch!

Celebration Beer

Brewsnbooze.blogspot.com, is now just brewsnbooze.com.

If anyone knows of some professional brewers that would like to contribute, that'd be awesome. I'd love to rock this mutha out. Maybe get some advertisers and whatnot. We'll see. As of now, keep it rockin' with your posts.

May Beer of The Month - Corona Light

Finding a Mexican Beer that really stands out is a tough task. Unless you're Ricardo Gonzálo Pedro Montalbán Merino.
But one Brews & Booze writer came up with one brilliant nomination, for a not so brilliant beer. So with that, I give you the May beer of the month, Corona Light, as nominated by JimStock.

JimStock's Nomination

NebraskaLand Days: No Longer Just a Choice Between Miller Lite and Bud Light

WILD WEST microFEST

"Thursday, June 12 features the 2nd annual Wild West microFEST at the Wild West Arena Pavilion. Come join in the fun and sample 15 different Craft beers made available by Johnson Brothers Liquor Company from Omaha, Nebraska. The tasting begins at 5:00 p.m. and runs through 9:00 p.m."

In case any of you missed the first annual microFEST (which I assume most of you did because I don't recall seeing any of you there); here is your chance to taste 15 exotic beers; receive a free tiny glass; and feel like a true beer snob in the heart of light beer land. You will have the opportunity to really feel like a professional "dark beer drinker" and attempt to justify your choices in beer to the rest of the Plattelanders who will stare at you through the chain link fence and wonder why you can't just drink Bud Light like everyone else.

The NebraskaLand Days staff would also like to remind all of you that following the beer fest you will have the opportunity to watch some live Professional Boxing in the arena.

To sum up: 1. Taste some beers delivered especially for you from Omaha; 2. Watch local boxers pound eachother. If you were looking for a reason to come to North Platte this Summer--there it is.

In other NebraskaLand Days news. . .

• Finger 11 cancelled out as headliner for rock night, but don't be discouraged because Lifehouse have stepped in to graciously fill the coveted spot (although at a higher price). . .
  
• Due to negative press for not conveying a family friendly theme, The 2008 slogan, "10 Days of Disorderly Conduct" has been replaced with "Nebraska's Official State Celebration." Not sure who officially decided that, but if you were planning on conducting yourself in a disorderly fashion, please be advised.
  

May Nomination: Mexican beer is Polly Pocket of Booze

Cinco De May, gone and passed. Thoughts? Its great, I guess. For a Monday. Without football.
I really struggled with nominating a beer for May that was 'mexican'. I've been trying to understand why that is. I love their food, labor, and generally appreciate paper mache decor.
Why then do I not have a soft spot for their beer?
Its great on a hot day, obviously. I love drinking on hot days; nothing there.
Its not expensive. Cheap is great so; nothing there either.
No frills labels. Awesome as well.

The one thing that bonds man to the beers he openly defends is a good hard session of binge with a beer in its purest form; a party keg.
Like our friends the Navajo will tell you, you don't experience the magic without throwing it up.

Nobody buys 3 cases of Corona and sits down with co-pilot for a suicide mission. You pick one out of the ice at a high school graduation party so you don't look as drunkenly.

Or in my case, you buy a 12 pack on your way to an impromptu Cinco party. Only to almost check out before realizing you didn't get a lime or two.
Buzz kill.
This is why I don't get this stuff. A required accessory? Come on Polly Pocket. You shouldn't need the pink comb, black corvette, and racially quota-ed pack of friends.
If I must, I'll choose Corona Light. You can't taste the diesel version anyway.

The Premie Bomb

It has taken quite a while for me to post over here--and really, when all you're dealing with is Budweiser and Busch Light, what is there to add?--but I have finally found some new inspiration:

The Premie Bomb.

The Premie Bomb, dear friends and readers, is perfect. It is on par with a Car Bomb, which I didn't think to be possible.

Quite simply, you do the following:

1. Take a pint glass and put an ounce or two of orange juice in it.
2. Fill the pint glass with a Friendly Grain Belt Premium until the glass is a little under 2/3rds full.
3. Take a shot glass with your choice of orange-flavored vodka.
4. Drop said shot into the beer.
5. Chug.
6. Move back to Step 1.

It is an incredible concoction--it actually somehow tastes like an Orange Julius, which is the king of mall drinks.

So step up to the plate, have a few of America's Party Beers, and have yourself a Premie Bomb in the process. You'll be glad you did.

As for our Omaha readers, Grain Belt Premium and Premie Bombs can be found at the Crescent Moon Ale House, 36th and Farnam.

Old Chicago, Cinco de Mayo Tour

I'm not sure why I find myself at Old Chicago all the time. Maybe it's the sub-par heart-attck food? But most likely it's because of the beer selection and TVs. Long story short, right now they're featuring a Cinco de Mayo tour. Overall it's pretty lame. The beers on the tour are your run of the mill Mexican beers: Dos Equis, Corona, Negra Modelo and Pacifico. If you ask any white person what Mexican beer they can think of, this list pretty much covers it. It's like a Cash-cab Red light challenge. Lame.

I want some exotic Mexican brew. 'Cmon Old Chicago, drive down to Tijuana, make some shady negotiations and bring back some real Mexican beer. Give me something that smells like Selma Hayak, tastes like Antonio Banderas, and gives you a hangover like Cheech. I mean, I can get your list at Albertson's.

The one redeeming thing about the tour is the t-shirt you get for completing it. I can't find a picture, but just imagine a brown shirt (obviously) with sombrero-wearing beer bottles.

Okay BeerBloggers, enlighten this blistering sunburner about some great Mexi beers.