Whoever named this beer either a.) has never been to key west, or b.) is 15. For a beer named Key West Sunset Ale, this beer is everything I imagine Key West NOT to be.
Unfortunately, the only frame of reference I have of Key West is from MTV's The Real World. Hence, I can only imagine what KW is like. I imagine barely dressed women getting so wasted they pass out along the beach. I imagine heat, lots of it. So hot it makes me sweat out of my eyeballs. I imagine an island full of Carribbeans who feel somewhat like Americans, but when we go there, they get us drunk and make fun of us. Which is fine because we're too drunk to care. I imagine palm trees, hurricanes, steel drums, and more drunk college students all singing Jimmy Buffet. I image flip-flops, sand, and erections. And if I had to imagine a sunset, it would be perfect. A bright orange sun that dips below the crystal clear water, creating an absolute heaven.
With that, this beer is almost illegally disappointing. If I had to liken it to anything, it'd be Fat Tire, which is the furthest from key west you can get. Hippy chicks, not naked ones. Cool Fort Collins air where they don't even have air conditioners, not sweltering heat with AC in every 5-star resort. Fat Tire is eco-friendly, which is the opposite of drunk tourists scattering their beer bottles and salt shakers all over the beachfront.
Fat Tire stands for something. Key West Sunset Ale stands for something too...shit.
The taste is malty with a hint of crappy citrus flavor. It actually tastes like whatever citrus they put in it was grown in Colorado. Sure, it's a smooth beer with a decent malty flavor. But you don't prance around like some flaming ballerina and call yourself Ray Lewis.
Horrible metaphors aside, Key West Sunset Ale is a horrible metaphor for Key West, but a great metaphor for anus.
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5 comments:
I'm wondering how, after looking at the label on this bottle, you decided that you would give this beer a try?
They use the same font Chili's uses for "this dish is kind of mexican none-the-less, spicy, and comes with ranch."
Yeah, that is definitely not going to win anything at The Fontys this year.
I heard Courier New is looking to sweep the "Best Performance while Lengthening a Research Paper" category, its third Fonty.
It's raggity-ass look was exactly what enticed me. I thought "this might be interesting". Plus, my girlfriend said she wanted something "summery". And the rest of the "summery" collection I had tried already.
Basically it was at the right place at the right time.
Ended up pretty shitty for me.
All in all, a good move though. Any label that features a picture of a polaroid picture, usually kicks ass.
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